I want you to think about a time when someone betrayed you. A time when someone betrayed your trust or stabbed you in the back or neglected to follow through with a commitment they’d made to you. Who was it that betrayed you? What happened when they betrayed you? Where were you when you found out that you’d been betrayed? What did you feel when this happened? How did you respond to the person who betrayed you?
As you think about the pain of betrayal… let this thought wash over your soul. The pain and the suffering and the sin of betrayal, has been defeated at the cross of Christ so that we who have been broken by it could be made whole and complete in Christ Jesus.
Look at Luke 22:47 – 53…
47 While he was still speaking, there came a crowd, and the man called Judas, one of the twelve, was leading them. He drew near to Jesus to kiss him, 48 but Jesus said to him, “Judas, would you betray the Son of Man with a kiss?” 49 And when those who were around him saw what would follow, they said, “Lord, shall we strike with the sword?” 50 And one of them struck the servant of the high priest and cut off his right ear. 51 But Jesus said, “No more of this!” And he touched his ear and healed him. 52 Then Jesus said to the chief priests and officers of the temple and elders, who had come out against him, “Have you come out as against a robber, with swords and clubs? 53 When I was with you day after day in the temple, you did not lay hands on me. But this is your hour, and the power of darkness.”
In this passage, Luke tells the story of how Jesus was betrayed by one of his closest friends and as the story unfolds we see how Jesus’ disciples and Jesus himself both responded to Judas’ betrayal and we see how Jesus confronts the root of the problem of betrayal.
The Betrayal Of A Friend
The reality that this passage brings to the forefront for us is that the pain of betrayal never comes at the hands of someone who doesn’t matter. The pain of betrayal always comes from the hand of someone who does matter. We’re not betrayed by faceless people. We’re not betrayed by people that we aren’t emotionally connected to. We’re not betrayed by people that we don’t trust. When we experience the pain of betrayal we experience that pain at the hands of someone we called friend. Someone close to us. Someone we loved dearly. Someone we invested in. Someone we should have been safe with. Someone we shared our lives with. Someone who should have been apart of our nurturing circle of relationships.
This is the truth of this passage that we have to wrestle with because in our passage Jesus isn’t betrayed by a faceless enemy, he’s betrayed by a close friend. In verses 47 – 48 Jesus is betrayed by Judas with a kiss. Luke tells us that “While he was still speaking, there came a crowd, and the man called Judas, one of the twelve, was leading them. He drew near to Jesus to kiss him, but Jesus said to him, ‘Judas, would you betray the Son of Man with a kiss?’” This is the betrayal of a close friend. The betrayal of someone who was part of the family. The betrayal of someone whom Jesus had shared life with. The betrayal of someone who should have been safe. The betrayal of someone who should have brought life into the relationship.
Betrayal never happens in a vacuum or in a box. The pain of betrayal isn’t just the pain of one person turning their heal against us. The pain of betrayal doesn’t have one singular face of one person who stabbed us in the back. The pain of betrayal is compounded for us because the pain and suffering we endure with betrayal comes from a crowd of multiple faces. Judas was one of Jesus’ closest friends and he lead a crowd of people right into Jesus’ place of safety with the intention to betray him to the death.
One of the temptations we struggle with when betrayal happens is the temptation to believe that somehow God was absent in the midst of our pain. If we’re really honest, we struggle with the temptation to believe that somehow God actually authored or caused the betrayal or that He actually betrayed us himself. It’s so tempting to believe that somehow when the pain and the suffering of betrayal enters into the doorway of our souls that God has somehow lost control because he didn’t keep us safe from the betraying death-kiss of someone we trusted.
The pain of the betrayal from a friend is painful because that friend has a face. When you experience the pain of betrayal: What are you tempted to believe about God? Are you tempted to believe that God isn’t trustworthy? Are you tempted to believe that God isn’t in control? Do you question God’s love for you? The pain of the betrayal from a friend is painful because that friend has a face.
The Response To Betrayal
Think about your knee-jerk response to people who’ve betrayed you. When we experience the pain of betrayal most of us automatically shift into defensive posturing or aggressive retaliation. We either seek to defend ourselves from further pain or we retaliate aggressively to keep our abusers just out of arms reach. We protect and attack and we become victims who abuse. As the old saying goes, “hurting people, hurt people”.
Our response to the pain and the suffering of betrayal is like an indicator on the dashboard of a car that tells us how well the car is running. When we’re living in fear or woundedness or shame or guilt, our dashboard gauges read quick to defend or quick to attack. But when we’re living in peace and contentment and wholeness and freedom then our dashboard gauges read, quick-to-extend-love and quick-to-extend-healing to our enemies when they injure us.
This is the contrast that is revealed between the response of the disciples and the response of Jesus to Judas’ betrayal. In verses 49 – 51 Luke tells us that, “When those who were around him (meaning Jesus) saw what would follow, they said, ‘Lord, shall we strike with the sword?’ And one of them struck the servant of the high priest and cut off his right ear. But Jesus said, ‘No more of this!’ And he touched his ear and healed him.” The disciples respond to Judas’ betrayal by defending and attacking but Jesus responds to Judas’ betrayal by extending the hand of love and healing.
The knee-jerk response from the disciples was to cause hurt and pain. They didn’t even wait for Jesus to answer their question. They didn’t spend time asking questions they actually wanted an answer to. They barreled on ahead as usual and they followed their natural impulse to defend and attack. A short reference to the other gospels informs us that it’s Peter who lashes out violently against Jesus’ enemies. And there would be so many great ways to justify his knee-jerk response. Peter could say that Jesus had warned them about the oncoming opposition so he was well within his rights to defend and attack. Peter could even say that Jesus instructed them to go buy swords and carry them around concealed for such as a time as this. Peter could argue that he was defending an innocent victim and attacking an evil enemy.
Who knows… Maybe Peter thought some of these things. Maybe he justified his fear of what was coming and his woundedness coming out of what Judas had just done in these ways. Maybe he wanted to prove that there was no way he could ever be guilty of denying Christ or betraying him like Judas. Jesus had already told Peter that he was going to stumble. Jesus had also instructed all of the disciples to arm themselves to the teeth spiritually for what was coming down the pike. Jesus had instructed them not once but twice to pray that they not fall into temptation. But they fell asleep instead and as a result Peter lashed out returning hurt for hurt.
Jesus’ response to Peter didn’t come in the form of an Atta-boy. He didn’t encourage Peter’s violent knee-jerk response. Instead Jesus told Peter to knock it off and then he reached forward and extended a hand of love and healing to the injured guard.
Our response to the pain of betrayal is the indicator light on the dashboard of our souls. Are you prone to defensive posturing where you hide from engaging relationally at a soul level with others because of some past hurt or wound? Are you prone to attacking those who’ve hurt you with your words or your actions? What would it look like for you to extend a hand of love and healing towards those who’ve betrayed you? How could you renew your commitment to prayer so that you don’t fall into the temptation of returning hurt for hurt?
The pain and the fear and the guilt and the shame that comes from being betrayed is real. But the healing and the wholeness and the forgiveness and the freedom that is offered to us from being in the Lord’s presence is equally as real and is infinitely more powerful. Our response to the pain of betrayal is the indicator light on the dashboard of our souls.
The Root Of Betrayal
Think with me for a moment about the thing beneath the thing. Think about the iceberg under the surface that sinks the ship. Think about the faulty foundation that causes the fractures in the walls of the house. Think about the unseen conditions that cause worldwide catastrophe. Think about the root of the problem instead of just what you can see on the surface of things.
I would argue that when it comes to the pain of betrayal by a close friend that what we need is a supernatural gift from God that gives us the ability to see the root of the problem behind the face that caused us the pain we’ve experienced. Jesus had this supernatural power. He knew that the things on the surface weren’t the real issue. He knew that there was something below the waterline that needed to be identified. He knew what the root of this betrayal was.
In verses 52 – 53 Jesus confronts the root of betrayal not just from his close friend, Judas, but also the betrayal from the crowd that came with him. Luke tells us that, “Jesus said to the chief priests and officers of the temple and elders, who had come out against him, ‘Have you come out as against a robber, with swords and clubs? When I was with you day after day in the temple, you did not lay hands on me. But this is your hour, and the power of darkness.’” On the surface of things, Judas betrayed Jesus. Guilty. On the surface of things the crowd that came with Judas was hell-bent on murdering Jesus. Guilty. On the surface of things they were all doing shameful things in the darkness of the garden instead of doing them outright in the daylight of the temple. Guilty. But the root under the surface is that these men betrayed Jesus in this way because of the spiritually evil darkness that had consumed their souls.
Identifying the root of betrayal is part of what sets you free from the power of the pain of betrayal. Do you struggle with the constantly churning wheel of blame and guilt that you’ve heaped upon other people who’ve hurt you? Do you find yourself questioning why someone would hurt you in this way? Are you trapped under the control of the pain and suffering of betrayal?
The only way you can speak honestly and lovingly to the people who’ve betrayed you is if you’ve come to grips with the root of their sin against you and the root of the sin that you and I are prone to. It doesn’t mean that they aren’t guilty. It simply means that God releases you from their power and control over you by revealing the evil darkness that powerfully controls them. Identifying the root of betrayal is part of what sets you free from the power of the pain of betrayal.
Some final observations regarding betrayal…
I’ve personally struggled for years with this pain and suffering that stems from the betrayal of close friends and other people that should have provided places of safety and relational nurturing. So this passage definitely opened old wounds for me. As I came to the end of a long week of wrestling with this text and exploring the deep dark rooms of my soul I was reminded of a passage and a quote that I want to leave you with.
Here’s the passage, Hebrews 4:14 – 16 & 5:7 – 9, “(4:14-16) Since then we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast to our confession. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. (5:7-9) In the days of his flesh, Jesus offered up prayers and supplications, with loud cries and tears, to him who was able to save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverence. Although he was a son, he learned obedience through what he suffered. And being made perfect, he became the source of eternal salvation to all who obey him.” Jesus knows suffering. Jesus knows the question of whether or not God the Father has heard our cries of pain. Jesus knows what it’s like to be tempted to fall asleep or to respond out of our hurt. Jesus knows the difficulty of obedience when the world around us is going to hell in a hand basket. You and I are not alone on this journey. The pain and the suffering of betrayal makes the gospel a sweet sound to the ears of those who are being saved by it.
Think about this quote from Anyabwile Thabiti, “When pain and suffering enters into the doorway of your soul you can look right at that pain and suffering and you can say… welcome my slave… I’m ready for you to accomplish what you came to do.” The suffering and the pain of betrayal is a slave in the sovereign hands of our Father in Heaven who loves us dearly.
The pain and the suffering of betrayal had a purpose in Jesus’ life. That purpose was the salvation of all who would trust in him. And the reality is that in many ways every one of us hearing this message has been the betrayer yet Christ still went to the cross and gave himself for every one of us so that we could be transformed from betrayers to sons and daughters. This is grace. This is love. This is purpose.
The pain and the suffering and the sin of betrayal, has been defeated at the cross of Christ so that we who have been broken by it could be made whole and complete in Christ Jesus.